[MUST READ] 7 Top Signs Your Career Is Killing Your Relationship
7 Top Signs Your Career Is Killing Your Relationship
Your relationship might be packing up without you knowing until the bubble burst on your face. Get to know the top signs your career is killing your relationship and have the opportunity to save it.
Elysha Krupp brings to you the signs to show that your career is really killing your relationship and offers the best advice on how you can make a major improvement to change the situation before it becomes a stumbling block.
1. You Can’t Be Away From Your Phone
Whether you’re checking work emails or just scanning Twitter, it’s pretty common to have your phone on the table during a night out. If you feel apprehensive about leaving your phone at home for two hours, you’re probably worrying too much about potential emails.
Advice: Just go out to dinner for two hours and leave your phone at home. This will probably feel like a mini holiday with your partner once you stop panicking for the first half-hour. (More phone etiquette tips right this way.)
2. You Use Business Slang In Your Personal Life
A quick scan through your text messages may reveal if you’re neglecting your relationship. Answering dozens of work emails every day can permanently alter the way you communicate via text. You’re in trouble if you’ve sent your partner any texts that resemble, “Just following up on a confirmation RE: dinner tonight. Would appreciate a response by COB.”
Advice: This is weird, and it makes someone feel like they’re talking to an auto-reply email response. Just text like a normal person.
3. You Don’t Go To Bed Together
S*x isn’t the only form of intimacy that matters. Just the simple act of falling asleep together can do wonders for your relationship if you’ve been going to bed late because of work. Going to bed together is pretty basic, but if you haven’t been doing it and are still somehow together, this is a good place to start.
Advice: Instead of working the extra few hours before going to sleep, lay in bed together and just watch some Netflix. Or have s*x. Or read. Or have great s*x without intercourse. Anything but talk about work.
4. You’ve Stopped Having S*x
52% of people admitted to having sleep problems related to stress at work, according to a workplace poll by the mental health charity Mind. And because more sleep leads to more s*x, there’s only one conclusion to draw: If you’re stressed at work and thus lacking sleep, you’re likely not wowing her in the bedroom like you used to. Though there are plenty of reasons why couples might have s*x less frequently, being overworked is certainly one of them.
Advice: If you’re not having as much s*x as you used to, make plans to have more s*x. It might take a while to get back into your old schedule. But chances are it will make you happy, which will lead to more s*x, which will lead to more happiness, which will lead to… you get it.
5. You’re Overly Sensitive
Do you normally get upset when your partner asks you for the third time to hang the new flatscreen on the wall? Probably not. But if you’re starting to hear a different tone in their voice lately, it could be more your perception than reality. Neff and Karney (2009) found that when under increased stress, we feel perceived slights, for instance, by our significant other, more acutely. The more stressed, the more reactive we are to the normal ups and downs of our relationship.
Advice: Try to unwind when you get home before engaging with your partner. Start talking to each other focusing on compliments before getting into any venting sessions.
6. There’s No Spontaneity
If you’re so overworked that you can’t make plans in advance, then you’re most likely not being spontaneous. It’s hard to plan to be spontaneous. In fact, it’s kind of impossible by definition. But a good spontaneous activity will probably inject more life into the relationship than a week of planned dates.
Advice: Next time you’re working over the weekend and you think to yourself, “Man, I wish I was doing [blank] instead,” just go to that thing. It will feel like you’re doing something wrong, but it will be worth it.
7. You Don’t Go Out Anymore
Whether you’ve married for 15 years or been dating for 6 months, you’ve got to make plans to get out of the house and spend some time together. If you’re spending too much time thinking about work, you probably haven’t planned a date night in a while. It sounds corny, but you should still “date” your wife or girlfriend.
Advice: If you’re have trouble coming up with some date ideas, think about where you would take someone on the fifth date. Studies say that tends to be an important one