One of the most common things in this generation that it was clear the previous generations didn’t have, is a closer relationship with the parents.
And unlike the parent/child relationship myth where fathers were expected to be closer to their daughters than their sons and mothers were expected to be closer to their sons than their daughters, these days, there are actually close relationships between mothers and daughters. Relationships where they can discuss everything or almost anything.
My mother and I are pretty close and yes, we are in this “discuss almost anything” category because she’s kinda like my bestfriend.
However, as much as we love our mothers and want to tell them every single thing going on with us, some information might actually throw them over the edge and make them very afraid simply because they are worried for their little girl.
Let’s talk about the types of info mummy doesn’t really need to know about.
1. Arguments that just happened- when you are angry, you are likely to toss some words you really don’t mean around. Those words might be weighty in reality but who cares at the time because you’re angry yeah? But when you have a fight with your man and you are still very angry and you feel the need to talk to your mom, then you pick up the phone and while narrating the whole scenario you say words like “I’m done…” “Its so over…” And other words that mean finality,she just might take your words for it at the time and believe there’s more trouble than there really is. And if you call her twice more with the same words during fights, she would begin to get worried and would soon start talking you into really “being done”.
2. Curable STDs- anybody who has sex with more than one partner is at the risk of contacting stds, believe it or not. Condoms are safe but we all know they aren’t 100percent safe. So a “small” case of stds might come up sometimes. I say small because it might be something minor that you can handle.
Now thing is, it doesn’t mean you’ve been irresponsible.it doesn’t mean you sleep around. It simply means that as much as you tried to be safe, it happened.
I mean, I have heard about a friend’s friend who is a hundred and twenty percent faithful to her man and who still got infected with stds. Now while I’m not going to delve into the issue of getting stds from your own man while you’re faithful, I’m saying its very possible that you contact it without being irresponsible.
Now if you mention this to your mom in one of your sisterly conversations, you are in for wahala. Because she would be extremely worried no matter how much you tell her treatment is going on and you can afford it. She is your mother and it would be very hard for her not to think of how sexually irresponsible you have been to have contacted an std. The conversation isn’t likely to end right, so how about you don’t mention it at all?
3. Constant arguments-if you have constant arguments about the same issues most of the time but its something you know you can live with while you both work it out, then don’t tell mommy. Its simple, if she learns there’s always an argument about a particular behaviour of his, two things would happen
-she’d get tired. Nobody(including your loving mom) wants to hear you whine about the same things everytime.
-she’d get worried and tell you to end the relationship since it seems the man would never change.
And in all sincerity, you might not even feel that seriously about it. So if its not so serious, don’t tell mommy.
4. His single life- maybe when he was single his schedule was work-hanging out with friends-clubbing-lots of hangover.
Maybe he did a whole lot of things he wasn’t even proud of. But then you know he wasn’t proud of them and you know deep inside that now the two of you are together, he’s ditched that him for a more responsible individual. However, if you share that past him with your mom, she’s not likely to think like you. She might believe things have not changed so much and judge him unfairly based on the past. So how about you separate this from the gist next time you talk to her.
5. Notification about a new guy-when you meet a new guy, you need to know him well and decide you want to pursue a relationship with him or not before telling anybody. This is because they might get excited for you and you just might not be with this person at the end of the day.
Mothers never expect their daughters to date many men before they finally settle down with “the one”. So whenever there is a new guy and you rush off to tell her, she might begin to ask about him over and over again until you get tired and wish you had shut up about him in the first place. In fact if your mom is like my mom, she would have pastors praying about him immediately she can get his name out of you.
So until you are sure, don’t tell mommy about the new guy.