Answers To The Most Awkward Sex Questions Women Ask
Many women have questions about sex that they may feel awkward to ask other people. Find out the answers to some of the most awkward sex questions they may have.
Is it normal that…. My boyfriend fakes orgasms?
Answer: Totally Normal
Look, you’ve been there. He’s pressing all the right buttons, but for whatever reason you just can’t get to the finish line.
It happens to men too – more than you’d think. Two recent US* studies found 30% of men admit to faking it on occasion, so while he’s not in the majority, don’t imagine that he’s a lone warrior trying desperately to recreate his orgasm face in the bathroom mirror.
‘It’s a similar story to women,’ explains clinical sexologist Dr Kat van Kirk. ‘Ability to orgasm can be affected by alcohol, tiredness, stress and some medication.’
But a bit like the Hunger Games, just because the ending isn’t a blinder, doesn’t mean the rest of it wasn’t great.
‘With his anticipation and the release of bonding hormones like oxytocin, the journey can be just as intense as the orgasm assures Dr Van Kirk.’
Avoid an anti-climax by making sure he’s fully turned on before penetration, advises psychosexual therapist Margaret Jones.
But if it’s happening regularly, you need to find a gentle way to, err, raise it. Start by assuring how satisfied you are, and that you wanted to check he feels the same. Yep. Bit awkward.
Answer: Totally Normal
Bum fun may have the rep as a sexual treat you only offer up on birthdays and anniversaries but, while just less than half of women have had anal sex, orgasm rates are actually higher for women who indulge in a little anal play than those who have straightforward vaginal sex.‘The area is actually anatomically configured for mind-blowing orgasms, so if you’ve experienced that, there’s no surprise you want to go back for more!’ says sexologist Jessica O’Reilly.
‘The super-sensitive nerve endings make it a responsive erogenous zone.’
It’s why soft touches to the outside and the stimulation of the ‘female cul-de-sac’ (lower vaginal wall) can feel so good. For a little variation, try a sex toy. ‘Start off with a small butt plug,’ suggests O’Reilly. ‘Or use a vibrator around the entrance to really up the anal fun ante.’
*National Survey of Sexual Health and Behaviour conducted by the Centre for Sexual Health Promotion, Indiana University
Answer: Totally Normal
Most sex noises are pretty, well, sexy. Others, not so much.Case in point – to use its street name – the fanny fart. ‘The ‘in’ thrust pushes air into the vagina,’ says Kaye. ‘And sudden change in position or another strong thrust then forces it out.’ Resulting in that noise.
The biggest FF culprits are from behind positions like doggie style, but you can reduce the chance of being surprised by the Brazilian breeze (yes, the infamous waxing style has inspired some people to try to make that happen) by using shorter strokes.
Or, embrace ‘em. Life’s rich tapestry and all that.
Answer: Totally Normal
Unless it’s painful for him, it’s nothing to worry about.The coil sits inside your uterus and has two tiny threads (made of plastic or very thin wire depending on your coil) attached to it.
‘Most women are approximately the same depth,” says GP Dr Philippa Kaye, “So ideally, the threads tuck themselves up behind the cervix.’
But if he can feel something, it may be the threads were cut too short (so are sticking out of the cervix like a bristly brush) or left too long.
Plus, ‘some men’s skin is more sensitive to the threads than others,’ says gynaecologist Dr Shreelata Datta.
Go to your GP who can make the right adjustments to your threads, or refit your coil if you need it.
Answer: Totally Normal
In essence there’s absolutely no problem with flicking the bean five times a week.While a US study on sexual behavior found that only 3% of women, aged 20-39, masturbated more than four times a week (compared to almost 17% of men), a recent study in Portugal found that almost 11% of women masturbated more than once a week.
So just because you’re streaking ahead in the self-pleasure stakes doesn’t make it a problem.
‘Masturbation is a common sexual practice among women,’ says Dr. Kelly Suschinsky.
‘Women masturbate for a variety of reasons – to feel sexual pleasure, cope with stress, help them fall asleep, or to have a sexual outlet while their partner is unavailable. As long as it’s not causing a problem in your relationship or interfering with your wider life, then just enjoy it.’
See. Who said two was better than one?
Answer: Totally Normal
Actually, studies have shown that when it comes to sexual arousal women aren’t necessarily turned on by images that ‘relate’ to their sexual orientation.A study by the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health at the University of Toronto tested the sexual reactions of men and women when exposed to various sexual images.
Whereas men tended to become aroused by images that corresponded with their sexual orientation (eg if they were straight, they were turned on by straight porn), the same wasn’t true for women.
Women who identified as straight were as equally as turned by a range of images, which included lesbian sex and, err, chimpanzee sex.
‘In fact, the research found that both women who were attracted to men and women who were attracted to other women reported that they were most sexually aroused by the videos that showed women-only sexual activities.’